Okay, guys: listen up! I am here to tell you what women want for Christmas. You probably already know it, but you dont understand it. What am I saying? Well, those little ads that have been mysteriously popping up on your dresser, on your workbench, or plastered to the windshield of your truck did not get there by accident. Somebody who wants you to pay close attention to what she really wants put it there. You dont think the wind blew it there do you? Oh, please! Lets go down the list and find out what your lady really wants for Christmas. I abbreviated everything for clarity and to be concise. That means the 27 items she really wants are condensed to just five. Get it?
1. Jewelry You had to ask? What woman doesnt want something shiny to wear on her fingers, around her neck, her wrist, her anklet, her belly buttonOkay, Im not talking custom jewelry either. Im talking about something that will retain its shine in all weather conditions and can be counted in the number of karats it possesses. You can count on it setting you back at least through the following June, probably as late as Thanksgiving
2. Chocolate Milk chocolate just doesnt cut it, fellas. Better for...