While Marco Polo, a Venetian, is generally given credit for discovering noodles in China, recent research suggests that Italian pasta in all its glorious varieties was actually discovered in Rome nearly a century earlier, and quite by accident, by a remarkably unlikely epicurean named Julius Amplonius, with the able assistance of an invading barbarian named Klunk, The Great.
The momentous event occurred one afternoon when this portly patrician was dining at a chic restaurant just off the Roman Forum. He was savoring a sip of red wine from Tuscany when a group of alarmed citizens came running by, screeching, The barbarians are coming! The barbarians are coming!
Amplonius had witnessed their arrival before, and by now he had made peace with the ancient wisdom, Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow you may be out of food and wine. It was by such Stoicism that the wise were able to witness the destruction of the Roman Empire while preserving a somewhat peaceful life. So, with a knowing smile, Julius simply raised his glass toward the fleeing crowd.
What are you going to do, Julie, just sit there and eat? a citizen who knew him quite well asked.
Why not?...
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