Ask the Marriage Maven: Angered by an Affair
Q. About a year ago, my husband had an affair with someone we both knew. It happened while I was pregnant. He said it would never happen again, but Im not so sure. Shes still in and out of our social circles.
I want to try to work things out, but every time I think about it, it makes me sick. The sad thing is that weve been married less than three years. Maybe he wasnt ready to be married. How do we work through our problems and have a happy marriage? Right now, it seems impossible.
P. R.
A. First off, let me say that Im sorry that this happened to you. Its hard to overcome the powerful feelings that linger after an affair. But if you think its impossible to have a happy relationship now, thats exactly what it will be. However, if you throw away the attitude of the impossible and embrace the one of determination, having a happy marriage can happen.
You might be right. It is possible (maybe probable) that your husband did not fully understand what your marriage would entail before getting into it, but now you both have a responsibility, and that includes raising your child.
It seems like...
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