Fear of Engulfment

| Total Words: 781

Roger, 33, is a successful engineer. Married with one child, Roger called me because his marriage was falling apart. His wife, Laura, had recently told him that the marriage was over unless they got some help. She told him she just couldnt take it any more.

Roger and Laura were both on the phone for their first phone session with me. Laura described what the problem was for her.

Roger is never present not with me, not with our daughter. He just does his own thing and doesnt consider what anyone else might need. If I get upset or irritated, he completely retreats and waits for me to fix it. He can retreat for days at a time and the energy around the house is awful. I try to take care of myself, but I just cant be around his negativity.

On top of that, if I ask him to do something, he either refused to do it, or says he will do it and then doesnt, or ends up messing it up. I know he is competent because of the work he does, but he sure doesnt act competent at home. The only time he is really interested in me is when Ive completely pulled back. If I want anything from him, he retreats. I cant live like this anymore!

Roger, I said, Do you know what...

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