Iraq Opens Suicide Bomber Range; Calls It Twice-Blessed Paradise Express
In an effort to reduce the loss of life and limb by suicide bombers, the Iraqi government has opened a suicide bomber range. The government’s intention is to encourage all those who are determined to carry out such an explosive termination to execute the insane plan in a way that is being hailed as twice-blessed.
The government maintains that it will be blessed because, one, the bombers will be carrying out their hope of putting themselves on the expressway to the paradise of their dreams and, two, they will accomplish their mission without blasting off with anyone else.
As Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki stated, “We have established a way for the suicide bombers to achieve their highest goal in a far more considerate way; now, they can blow themselves up in sanctimonious privacy.
A suicide bomber, who had arrived to take advantage of the new opportunity, said, I think the government did a great thing. Just think! Now, I get to blow myself up, which I long to do so much I can’t express the intensity of my need. But now, while the end will be the same for me, I wont...
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