It’s hard to get out around other people when I am depressed and I have been depressed all my life. My self esteem makes me think I in no way measure up to others. I wonder if maybe I am too tall, overweight, clumsy, don’t wear the right clothes, people hate me, people think I am a bum. Those are all of the things I am thinking when I go out in the world. I feel I am under constant scrutiny.
I have been trying something different lately and sometimes it works. I have been trying not to look at people to see if they are looking at me. Now I realize that if I go through life with my head down or with blinders on, people may look at me even more.
What works for me(sometimes) is to focus on other things. We are all people watchers but I try to limit it to watching people at a distance. At closer range I try to focus on something else like the scenery, be it trees, buildings or the traffic light (when I am waiting to cross the street).
It is very discouraging and heartbreaking when we don’t feel like we are just as good as other people.
On bad days when I try to get out and do something such as go to the store or ride my bike, I soon...